Finding Myself in the Midst of It All

It's a boy!

2009-08-20T17:15:00.005-05:00

So, my little alien is no longer an alien! James Russell is doing well and right on track. His heartrate was 135 and he's about 10-12". I'm sure I'm a bit biased, but I think he's a cutie! We got to see blood flow to his kidneys, legs, heart and brain. They measured his whole body, stem to stern.

He's got 10 fingers, 10 toes, 2 arms, 2 legs and is definitely a boy! It was amazing to see him moving and wiggling and punching during the ultrasound. T kept laughing when he punched and asked if I could feel it. I can never tell if it's a kick or a punch, but I definitely feel things at times. I'm looking forward to T being able to feel it, too. Only 18 more weeks to go before we get to meet JR!

Bill's Korean Kaper

2009-05-20T13:19:00.002-05:00

For all 2 of you who might be out in blogland, I thought I'd pass along a blog link that should eventually have some great stories. My dad is in Korea this year teaching English. He's finally started a blog. It's called Bill's Korean Kaper. He's only got one post so far, but I'm hoping he'll post pictures and keep it updated. He tells good stories, so this should be fun. Enjoy!

Our little "peanut"

2009-05-15T13:23:00.009-05:00

So, I've been gone awhile from blogland. It's been busy with work and keeping up with T. He spent a month in Florida doing Navy stuff and was able to combine all of his drills for the rest of the year with his AT to knock it all out at once. That's nice so we don't have to pay for a plane ticket each month, but I'll miss my drill weekend freedom. It kind of sounds bad, but it's nice to have one weekend to yourself sometimes. But, I'll happily give up my weekend for him to be around the rest of the time.

Part of the reason I've been gone is that we found out we're having a baby! I am so excited. It's been a long time coming (at least for me). I just haven't had the energy to blog about stuff for awhile. We are 8 weeks this week and got our first ultrasound this past Wednesday. The baby has a good strong heartbeat - it was 168 during the ultrasound. It was surreal to see it on the monitor. It's one thing to see it on tv or to see other people's pictures, but to see it for our own and ourselves was the coolest thing I think I've ever done. I could have stared at it all day. I loved watching the small blip of a heart beating steadily. We got a few pictures, which unfortunately didn't scan as well as I had hoped, so I'm trying to scan them again. I'll post them soon. The majority of people I talk to think it's a boy. Except for cjoy and the "determine the sex based on heartbeat level" website, both of which say it's a girl. I'd really love a girl because I have such a great relationship with my mom and my friends' girls. Don't have nearly as much experience with boys, but I'm pretty sure it's a boy and have already started to love the thought of a boy.

We've gone round and round with names. We, of course, have boys name picked out. T has, since we first discussed kids when we were dating, suggested and advocated for Bubba Hoss. Bubba is because he will be from the South and Hoss because T loves the show "Bonanz". I have finally determined (I think) that this is a joke, but I'm not exactly sure. Now, he wants Robert Josiah to shorten to Bubba Hoss. I think we have settled on James Russell (the first legit sounding name he gave me more than a year ago). But, I also like Joshua Harrington. The weekend before I took the first test, I kinda new something was going on, I saw the name Joshua everywhere. I looked up the meaning (the Lord is my salvation) and loved it. Harrington was my grandfather's middle name and I just like it. But, I think it'll be James Russell (his and his dad's middle names). We have trouble with girls names. I like Grace as the middle name with several first name options: Caroline, Anna, & Elizabeth. My great-grandmother's name was Anastasia and I love the name, but it's long, so I thought shortening it to Anna would work since that's probably what she'd be called. So far, Caroline and Abigail have been nixed for various reasons. I tried Carolina (like Carolina Herrera), but it got vetoed, too. So, we're stuck with girls names, which means it'll probably be a girl. We find that out August 10. That seems so far away, but I've been told it'll be here before I know it.

So, that's what's going on in this little corner of the world. I've not enjoyed the nausea or the inability to handle certain smells or brushing my teeth, but things are so good right now I don't think I'd trade them for anything. T has been so sweet and comments often about being parents and how cool this all is. I think he's more excited than he's willing to admit. And, our moms are thrilled. My mom asked for pictures of the ultrasound and wanted at least a 4x6 - I jokingly suggested blowing it up to a poster size and she was all for it. It's a first grandchild for her and she's already planned her vacation time around Christmas when it's due. It's fun to see her so excited. I'm not sure how we'll balance both moms wanting to come at the same time, but I think it'll work itself out. I feel blessed to have so many people who are excited and love this baby before they even get to meet him (or her).

Addictions

2009-02-19T17:24:00.002-06:00

I'm addicted to Facebook. I love reconnecting with friends and keeping tabs on what everyone's up to. I'll also freely admit there are a few games on there that I love to play. Especially if I'm at work and on hold on the phone. I've created buttons (they're called Flair on the site), adopted a beagle puppy named Copper (from Disney's "The Fox & The Hound") and a black horse named Elphie (from "Wicked"), uploaded photos, done surveys and those random "get to know your friend" kind of email lists, gotten a high score of 203 bowling, and have the 2nd highest score on the IQ test "Who Has the Biggest Brain". It unnerves me that our law clerk from last summer has a higher bowling score (230) and a guy I remember as a class clown (though pretty smart) has a "bigger brain" than I do (my head, I think, is physically larger, so logically I assume my brain is bigger to fill up the othwerwise extra space, but his score is higher, so his is "bigger"). All in all, Facebook is a great way to kill time and avoid working.

So, why am I blogging and not on Facebook? My computer randomly decided this afternoon that we have a new firewall installed and it blocks Facebook. Does it block any other website I use? Nope. Just Facebook. I think this may be God's way of not so subtly redirecting me back to work. But, my computer at home is so slow bowling will be out. I can still feed and play with the puppy, but anything requiring a semi-speedy computer will be out. Plus, now I have to find a way to kill time while on hold or talking to someone who really doesn't require my full attention (ex: the associate down the hall who just likes to talk). I think I'm going to go with withdrawal for a few days.

Birthdays and stuff

2009-02-14T22:56:00.002-06:00

This 32nd post just so happens to be about my 32nd birthday. Random. It was different this year. I thought 30 would be bad, but it was so much fun going to NY with one of my best friends, cjoy, that I didn't really notice I was out of my 20s. 31 wasn't too bad because it didn't really seem that old. This year, though, was much harder. The day before, I had a mini meltdown in the car on the way to work. I started thinking about all the things I want to do with my life and how I another year was almost up and none of them were done. I managed to snap out of it by the time I got to the office, but I was kind of in a mood all day. The actual day started out just as bad. I stood in the bathroom brushing my teeth lamenting about how "old" I was and how nothing ever seemed to change and I am in the same place in life I was a year ago. Then, all of a sudden, I realized how crappy it sounded to be whining to God on my birthday and decided I needed an attitude adjustment. I decided I would be thankful for another day and another year. I had to keep convincing myself all day that things are good. I am happy, relatively healthy, have a great husband and a good job. I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and food on my plate, which is more than many people in the world can say confidently.

The day progressed and, other than getting fussed at by a judge, it got much better. My mom called to remind me that she felt better that day than she did 32 years ago (an annual tradition done for both me and my sister). My dad emailed from Korea to give me an update on things (he moved into his "permanent" apartment on my birthday and is doing well). Various friends called or emailed during the day to wish me happy birthday. Friends at church made plans to go out next weekend to celebrate. My office had cake, which everyone seemed happy to devour, and I hosted Bunco. It was a small group this month, but fun, nonetheless. We had more cake and enjoyed visiting and catching up. Overall, it was a pretty decent day. Not as joyful as birthdays past, but I finished the day content, which was a marked improvement from how it started.

Then, after everyone left, I opened presents from T. HE GOT ME A Wii! I was so shocked when I opened it and he was grinning the whole time. I mentioned the possibility of getting him one for Christmas after a friend got one for her birthday last summer. He didn't seem too interested (though he's playing the boxing game while I blog and loving it), so I didn't really pursue it other than telling him I thought we'd enjoy it. I was mostly interested in the fitness package they have. I stopped going to the trainer just before Ike to take a break. I decided not to go back after the first of the year because I feel very compelled to get my credit cards paid off and be as debt free as possible. If T gets mobilized, we may be able to pay off the house (or at least a pretty significant chunk of it) and by then, my car would be paid off, so we'd be doing pretty good. But, I digress. What shocked me the most was that I haven't mentioned the Wii since around Thanksgiving, but he remembered! I've gotten some strange gifts from him in the past, sometimes they seem like last minute desperation gifts, but they are always things I like (books, tickets to Body Worlds, movies, etc). This time, though, he really listened.

Today is Valentine's Day. I spent it babysitting for friends who are moving this weekend. They hhave 2 girls who are 3 and 4.5 and are getting ready for a boy in a couple of months. They are great, loving kids and very much fun (most of the time) to hang out with. We went to the park and then to lunch before going to grandma and grandpa's house for a nap. My friend thinks it was a blessing for me to take the girls, but really, it's a blessing to get to hang out with them. T and I made dinner and then exchanged gifts for V-Day. We don't usually do anything big, but I try to do something at least slightly romantic. I made him a bath basket with some stuff he's been talking about needing to get at the store. I usually get flowers at work or some kind of candy. He totally outdid me this year (not that it's a competition or anything, but you know what I mean).

He got me the other 1/2 of the Wii package I had been wanting - the Wii Fitness! The Wii came with a sport package that has baseball, tennis, bowling, golf and boxing. It's a lot of fun. The Fitness one, though, has so much more. It has a balance board that you stand on and real exercises, several of which are disguised like games (like hula hoops and ski jumping for balance or a race for cardio). We have spent the last 2 hours playing. It keeps track of your weight (measured from the board, so there's no cheating) and your fitness level. You can't do the harder versions until you've done the easier ones a sufficient number of times successfully enough that the machine thinks you won't hurt yourself. You can choose a male or female trainer for the yoga or strength training exercises and she's encouraging but not too cheerful (I don't really like the "you can do it" said with a too cheerful and cheesy smile).

So, I will now go to bed (after a good shower because you actually do get sweaty playing a video game) knowing God has indeed blessed me with a great husband who is listening more than I realized and who cares enough to play silly video games with me and encourage me in working out. I am a lucky woman.

USS New York

2009-01-21T11:35:00.010-06:00

"Terrorist Around the World Cower in Fear from the US!" That would be a cool headline. I just got pictures from a friend of one of the newest Navy ships - the USS New York. It looks like most other Navy ships - same drab gray all dressed up in her prettiest red, white and blue for her debut. This one, though, is different. I think this one will hold the heart of just about every American and those who have the privilege of serving aboard her will be serving on a piece of American history.

The USS New York is very appropriately named. She's built with 24 tons of scrap steel from the fallen World Trade Center towers. According to the press release I got, she's the fifth in a new class of warship - designed for missions that include special operations against terrorists and will carry a crew of 360 sailors and 700 combat-ready Marines to be delivered ashore by helicopters and assault craft.

The press release also said that "steel from the World Trade Center was melted down in a foundry in Amite , LA to cast the ship's bow section. When it was poured into the molds on Sept 9, 2003, 'those big rough steelworkers treated it with total reverence,' recalled Navy Capt. Kevin Wensing, who was there. 'It was a spiritual moment for everybody there.' Junior Chavers, foundry operations manager, said that when the trade center steel first arrived, he touched it with his hand and the 'hair on my neck stood up.' 'It had a big meaning to it for all of us,' he said. 'They knocked us down. They can't keep us down. We're going to be back.'"

The ship's motto is "Never Forget".

Terrorist around the world may not be cowering in fear just yet, but wait until the USS pulls in to port!

Korea

2009-01-19T13:53:00.005-06:00

My dad's moving to Korea for a year! He leaves next Thursday, January 29, and will be gone for a whole year! I still can't believe he's doing this - even though I've known about it for a couple of months, until he got the visa number and a plane ticket, I wasn't really sure he'd go through with it. He'll be teaching English in a public school in Yang-ju, a city of about 150,000 about thirty miles due north of Seoul. I'm really excited for him, a little nervous for him, and can't wait to figure out how to afford a plane ticket to go see him.

He's getting a furnished 2 bed/ 2 bath apartment with a driver and everything. He'll also have a bus pass for the public transportation and medical care while he's there, so he'll be really well taken care of. I think they are happy he's coming. He's the first teacher they've had for awhile. He said that so many young college graduates that go only want to go to the big cities, so the smaller towns suffer a bit.

He'll have all ages - from toddlers to high school kids. Their goal is to make all of their kids truly bilingual, so his classroom will only be taught in English. He'll have a Korean aide to do the discipline and assist students, but he is to only conduct lessons in English. He's going to have to come up with some inventive lesson plans because teacing 2 year olds is much different from teaching 15 year olds! I can't wait to see what he comes up with.

After experiencing Korea through my friend's Air Force adventure (you can read about her adventures here), I'm hoping he'll find lots of amusing and unusual things and send lots of pictures. I hope we'll get to go visit and see a new part of the world while he's there. I think this will be a fun adventure for him.

New Car Update

2009-01-08T19:44:00.003-06:00

For the two or three of you out there, haven't seen my Facebook update and might care, we're now the proud owners of a 2009 shiny white Toyota Tacoma.

I really voted for the Camry, but it's not my car and I didn't sweat on a beach to earn the money for the car, so it's not really my call. I'll see if I can get a picture of him in it soon. For now, we're waiting for the Salvation Army to come pick up the Blue Bomber (he got under it this afternoon and found a golf ball sized hole in the engine which would cost $3-5,000 to replace). We'll get a decent tax write off next year and he gets to drive a new car that has a warranty. I'm excited for him. T got a good deal on it and is really happy - once he convinced himself it was ok to spend the money on it. He laughed at me at lunch today when I told him it was ok to enjoy it - he said he'd been telling himself that all morning. He doesn't spend money very much and rarely on himself, if at all, so he's definitely due. I'm excited for him.

New Cars

2009-01-06T22:29:00.002-06:00

Christmas was great and 2009 has started off well - at least until today... I got a phone call today at lunchtime that I've been hoping to avoid but suspecting I'll get for awhile. T's car died today. And it didn't die at home. He was on a major road through our town (but thankfully not on the freeway he was on yesterday when his tire went flat). He limped into the parking lot of an urgent care facility, walked a couple of blocks to a restaurant we frequent and called me to come get him when he was done with lunch. At least he got some exercise and food out of this. I went and picked him up and he dropped me off at the office and went to look for a new car. Hopefully by this time tomorrow, we'll be the proud new owners of a new Camry or Tacoma and the Protege will be donated to a worth charity. I wish it had happened 2 weeks ago so we could have the tax write off. Now, I'll have to hold on to the receipts and donation paperwork for a whole year!

At first, he called and asked me about the truck. Then, he called about the sedan... totally different options, but he can see benefits for both. The only down side is the truck he likes only has 2 doors. It has a back seat, but it's hard to get into. At least it has a back seat. I started looking up prices and information on them, trying to find something in stock - he likes a manual and I managed to track down one of each kind of car in my search. Neither are at the same dealership, but the guy he talked to said he could get either of them to the dealership within 24 hours. His 2 choices are very different, though about the same price. Getting a manual definitely is cheaper!

I've been trying to talk him into a model that has some incentives - cash back or 0% financing seem like a good deal to me - you get a nicer car for no extra money if you do the cash back and no interest is a good deal even if you have the cash to pay for the car. We are very blessed to still have the majority of the money he's earned doing Navy work over the last year still in savings. It's not as much as thought he had, but it's enough to buy the car. It makes me nervous to spend that much money all at once because I like the cushion of savings, but since his car leaked all the oil in the parking lot and the blew the engine block, I am just feeling happy we can afford this at this time. God has been very gracious in extending the life of the "Blue Bomber", as the crew in CA named it. It's a 1997, has well over 130,000miles on it (it's made rounds trips between AL & VA, AL & TX, TX & PA, and TX & CA) and has been a fantastic little car. I know he's distraught over losing it and frustrated to have to buy something quickly, but he's very much due for something newer. We've recently looked at gently used and discovered right now, a new one isn't that much more, so I think it's pretty much a done deal. He just needs to decide between a truck and a sedan. Maybe it's just me, but it seems like that would be a choice you'd make before you start researching prices and features and stuff... but, T and I don't do very many things the same way!

We're starting off 2009 with a Hail & Farewell party in our house. Fair winds and following seas to the Blue Bomber! Welcome aboard new car!

Snow in Houston!

2008-12-11T17:54:00.005-06:00

Growing up in GA, to me, anything west of the Mississippi River was "The West". I, of course, lived in "The South". Really - I know Texas fought in the Confederacy, but I never (and truthfully, still don't) think of Texas as part of "The South". It's a debate I've had with Texans since moving here 7 years ago. They all think because they are geographically south and they fought in the Confederacy, they are part of "The South". I still disagree - being geographically southern does not make you Southern and being west of the Mississippi just makes you "western".

I also never thought it really snows - especially along the coast. Well, for the second time in my 7 years as a transplanted Texan, I've been proven wrong. It snowed Christmas Eve of 2004 and Tim missed the actual snowfall because he was stationed in PA back then didn't get home until about 2am Christmas Day because of weather delays "up north" (which is anything north of the Mason Dixon line, in case you were wondering).

Last night, it snowed again - this time, he was here to see it. We live in the southeastern part of the State close to the water, so when I heard it was snowing on the north side of town, I was happy for them but didn't think it would make it down to our part of town. It's often a difference of 5-10 degrees between where we are and the north side of town about 30 miles away. I had a huge thrill when I walked out of the office last night into actually falling snow. It ended up being just over an inch deep at our house. It was perfect - a light snowfall without the biting wind that often comes with cold weather.

It was so much fun to play in - except I got so excited I didn't put real shoes one. I went out in my hard bottomed fuzzy slippers thinking since my feet were so warm and toasty inside, they'd be fine. I was wrong - my slippers ended up soaked and my feet freezing. Funny thing was, they weren't freezing until T finally dragged me back into the house just before midnight. Here are some pics from our house and a friend's house. Hopefully it'll happen again soon (like maybe Christmas Eve!).

Cutest Kids

2008-12-05T10:32:00.015-06:00

Since we have no kids of our own, I've have effectively "adopted" my friends kids. I have four girlfriends here who each have 2 kids - 6 girls (including a set of identical twins) and 2 boys. Each pair is the same gender, so my friend with the 2 boys is way outnumbered! When we do small group stuff, especially at holidays, we take pictures. I am going to show them off because I don't get to show off my own kids yet... Am I a pretend aunt to the cutest kids or what?

The girls at Halloween

The boys at Halloween

Christmas

Just because

When I was a kid, there were a few ladies in my life that were so important to me. They helped me grow and learn things in the world outside my family. They were more than teachers, they were friends. It isn't often you find an adult that treats you like a friend instead of a child. They talked to me on my level but never talked down to me. They were so very instrumental in making me who I am today. I hope I can be that kind of friend for these kids. There are some days when a hug from them makes my day so much better. I look forward to seeing them Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings. I love it when their face lights up when they see me. I can't wait to experience this with my own kids.

Happy Thanksgiving

2008-11-27T11:37:00.002-06:00

I am so glad it's Thursday! I know the saying is TGIF, but this week, TGIT! I have been looking forward to this 2 day vacation for quite some time. I spent the week running back and forth between hearings with crazy people downtown, a deposition and a mediation. I was really stewing and worrying as I tried to sleep last Sunday, but God has proven faithful once again and gotten me through a week I didn't think I'd survive with my sanity in tact. I drove away from the mediation downtown yesterday shouting praises at God as I headed back to the office. I'm glad no one else was in the car, because I'm not sure they'd understand. I finally felt the knots in my stomach unwind and my eye that's been twitching for over a week finally started to calm down a bit as yesterday went on. I even got to leave the office around 3:30 yesterday - and truthfully, the last 30 minutes or so was spent playing Word Twist on facebook while Tim ate leftover lunch from our potluck Thanksgiving day lunch.

Today, even though I had all the freedom in the world to sleep in, I still woke up early. The turkey is almost done cooking - another 30-50 minutes, the deviled eggs (new for me this year) are done, the sweet potatoes are ready to be baked. There's a pumpkin dessert waiting and I just need to mash some white potatoes and mix up the green bean casserole and we're good to go. I'm excited (and hungry).

Last night, we started what I hope will become a new tradition. We met with the other 4 couples in our small group with all the kids for our own Thanksgiving supper. It was so much fun to eat with people you like and care about and have the kids running around. I realized we're the only couple that doesn't have 2 kids to add to the mix, but for now, I'm ok with that. When we walked in, several of the girls (the oldest is 5, the youngest is almost 3) all jumped up and shouted "hey, it's Mr. Tim". I don't think he knew what to do with that! They all ran over and hugged us and by the end of the night, they were climbing on him and he was chasing them around. I think he really likes the group better with the kids. They're all really good kids, so they're fun to be with. Hopefully this'll "soften" him up a bit. One day...

Tomorrow, I'm planning to try to get to Kohl's and a few other shops to work on Christmas shopping. There are a couple of really good deals at Kohl's, but they open at 4AM!! I really want to be there when they open because I want the gifts I found that are not only on sale, but I have an additional 15% off coupon good even with sale projects. Not sure if I'll get there when they open, but I'm going to try.

For now, though, I'm going to check on the turkey and watch the end of the Macy's parade. I'm truly thankful for my family and the blessings I've been given - including thse 2 days off of work!

John Harrington Rosser

2008-11-04T08:40:00.002-06:00

My grandfather died this morning. He was an amazing man. I think if a dictionary was all pictures, you'd see his picture next to love. He was the best example I've ever seen of how to love others. He and my grandmother were married for almost 60 years. I've been able to witness it for the last 30. I didn't know it when I was a kid, but as I grew up, I watched how he handled other people. He always had a quick smile, sometimes indicating something mischevious was about to happen. He disciplined in love (although I was too stubborn to see it when I was younger). He and my grandmother always made sure each of their 7 grandkids felt like the only one he had. I am the oldest grandkid. The youngest is not quite 13. There's competition in a lot of families amongst kids and grandkids to be the #1 loved kid. I have always felt like I was #1 in their book. But, I know all of my cousins feel the same way. I don't know many people who can share their love that equally.

My grandfather taught me a lot of things in life. When I was really little, he was the first to show me what real cooperation was about (although I'm pretty sure I was the one trying to do the teaching, having told him if he'd just cooperate with me, we could have the leaves raked up much easier). Before duct tape caught on as the master "fixer up" tool, he taught me in his woodworking shop out back behind the house that there's nothin in life a little glue won't fix. I had trouble saying glue and since then, our family joke has been "a little 'woo' will fix it". He showed me how to peel a green grape and make it an eyeball to scare someone. He tried to teach me how to garden (it's a lesson I never quite mastered). He taught me the importance of making time for people even when you feel like you don't have the time. He made sure he attended graduations from high school, college and a late visit after law school. But most importantly, he showed me how to love. I'm pretty sure he didn't even know he was teaching the most important lesson - learning to love unconditionally is hard. I'm not sure I'll ever master it, but I had the best example in my grandparents.

Sticker Charts

2008-10-28T19:55:00.003-05:00

I've decided my will power is about that of a 4 year old. In an effort to push myself towards a healthier life, I've decided to do a point system with rewards. So, I've created a sticker chart. You heard me - a sticker chart. I figure if it works for 4 year olds, it'll work for me. Every day I drink at least 8 8oz glasses of water (measured by my trusty water bottle) and I take both packets of vitamins, I get a sticker. At the end of the week, if I have all my stickers, I'll put $5 in my green Grinch bank (I find the bank humorous - especially I emptied it for toll money and necessities during my evacuation trip - I am not grinchy when it comes to spending money). As I start back to working out, I'll add those stickers in, too. At the end, when I've reached my weight loss goal, I'll hopefully have a nice stash of cash to go shopping for new clothes. It'll be disciplined savings for delayed gratification as well as encouragement on my way to a goal I'm having trouble keeping. I'm not focusing on the weight loss just yet because I'm trying to establish the water/vitamin habit. I've done great for 4 days now, so I have to stay consistent to get to the 21st day when a habit will hopefully have formed. It's kind of humorous to have a sticker chart with gold stars, but I find it oddly motivating. I want that next sticker. Seems like such an easy reward, but I slacked off a bit on my water just before lunch and by the afternoon, I was feeling it. It took me a few days to start feeling rehydrated and processing liquids normally, so I think I was really missing it when I slacked off. Feeling lousy may be reason enough to stay on track - I don't want to feel like that again! As soon as I started back with the water, my headache started disappearing. So, I'm off to take my last vitamin packet and drink another glass before settling in for the night. Another day, another sticker. Woo hoo!

Feeling "Wicked"

2008-10-21T22:34:00.003-05:00

I got to go home last weekend for an all too short visit. Wicked (www.wickedthemusical.com) was in town and my mom, sister and I decided we should go see it. I'm a huge fan of Broadway and musicals, but this is the only show I have intentionally sought out and actually traveled home or had people fly out to me to go see. I've now seen it 4 times. I guess that's a bit overboard, but it's that good of a show. I love seeing it with both my mom and sister and the people in the crowd who have never seen it. If you don't know anything about it, it's a prequel to The Wizard of Oz. It's the story of the 2 witches in Oz before Dorothy arrived. They go from "loathing" each other to realizing that each has mattered to the other. They realize that, regardless of their differences (which go beyond their outward appearances) each has changed the other.

Wicked is a story of learning to believe in yourself, learning to let others into your life even if they are different and learning how to stand on your own - even when it means going against the flow. There are really funny references to the movie The Wizard of Oz, but they are kind of hidden. It's so much fun to watch the audience reaction to the jokes - they usually miss the first one, but after that, they seem to catch on fairly quick. I also love watching the audience's reaction to the plot twist at the end. It's usually a collective gasp of shock - which I love to see. I love listening to those around me whisper as they start to catch on to things. It's such a fun show with great music that just sticks in your heart and makes you happy. If you get the chance to see it, I so highly recommend it. So far, it's the only show I have intentionlly bought 2 tickets back home to see.

The rest of the weekend was just as eventful - a blown power steering fluid line led to an extended trip to Wal Mart. We attempted to make merenguie cookies, which didn't turn out anything like the first time I tried them. Church Sunday, running into old friends and meeting new ones. All in all, it was a great weekend!

Home Again, Home Again

2008-10-07T11:17:00.017-05:00

Turns out, you CAN go home again. It's not the same as when you left, but it's still home. Some things never change when you meet up with real friends. It doesn't matter how long it's been, when you're back together again, things pick up where they left off. It was the best weekend I've had in a very long time. I was so sorry it passed so quickly. We had an adventurous weekend, that's for sure.

T and I left Houston on a flight that was supposed to leave at 5:30pm and arrive in Atlanta at 8:30pm. Instead, we left at 10:30pm and got to our initial destination at 3 in the morning the next day. We had a slow tire leak in our rental car and had to stop for air each morning before beginning the day's adventure! We got to Clinton around supper time Friday afternoon and met up with Brenna, who was my roommate my sophomore year. We found several more people after supper at the pep rally and had a great time catching up and visiting.

Saturday, T & I got up early to do the fun run with Becky. We got to the stadium during what we thought was the registration time only to find out the race started 15minutes before we got there! So, we did our own fun run and walked around campus catching up and making lots of noise for the current residents of Grotnes 227 (our room my senior year). After quickly showering and changing, we went back to campus to meet everyone at the Alumni Green to get our class photo taken. We found Ellie, Stacy & Mary Frances and spent more time catching up with friends from long ago. Someone commented that we all looked the same - the only difference now is that there are kids around. I can't wait for the day I can take my own little Blue Hose back to campus!

After the class photo, we met up with others for the tailgating lunch and game. PC is in the process of moving up to Division I football. Saturday, we played the North Greenville College Crusaders and we won! It's only our 2nd win of the season and came after a couple of really disappointing losses to Wofford, App State and Elon. Right now, it's a learning experience, but hopefuly one day we'll be competing with the bigger schools for bragging rights.

Saturday after the game found us walking around campus again revisiting everything - even the remodeled campus center. Springs is totally different now - they have filled in the pool and made it into a state of the arts fitness center. That was the best change - one I wish they had made 15 years ago so we could have enjoyed it. Saturday night was spent eating out at Senor Garcia and walking around campus yet again just visiting - and taking pictures with all the new statutes.

It amazes me that someone thought that was a good use of money. Seems like it would have been better to forego the statutes (one of which is in the middle of a walkway where three separate paths converge) and use it to renovate Doyle Hall - the condemend building that's on the National Historical Register so they can't tear it down. It was condemned 10 years ago, but no one has done anything with it except board it up and block it off. Seems like waste of space!

We capped off Saturday night by visiting the Alpha Sig house with Becky's husband and some friends. It was nice to sit on the top rail of the deck again, but sad to see how young the current students are. We remember looking at the alums when we were students thinking they were so old - now, we're the old ones being stared at.

Sunday found us racing back to Atlanta to catch a flight home. We made it in time for the wedding of some friends of ours.

All in all, it was a great weekend - it's amazing how nothing really seemed to change in 10 years. The campus has changed, but my friends are still the same goofy wonderful people they were 10 years ago. There's something about crossing the railroad tracks and being back inside the bubble that takes years off your life. It's such a safe and welcoming place - I didn't want to leave. I hope it's not 10 more years before we do this again!

Going "Home"

2008-10-03T02:24:00.003-05:00

This weekend is Homecoming at Presbyterian College (www.presby.edu) and my 10 year reunion. I can't believe 10 years has gone by so fast. PC is a small private liberal arts college in the middle of nowhere. At least it feels that way. It's in a small town in the upstate of South Carolina in between Greenville and Columbia called Clinton. There is a town not too far from Clinton called Prosperity. Since I was there during the late 90s, when President Clinton was in office, and I was in a relatively conservative part of the state, there were lots of pictures of the directional sign Clinton/Prosperity with arrows facing in opposite directions. The town is really small - maybe 10,000 or so if I had to guess. And everyone in town seems to either work at PC or have some connection to it. In a town that small, the college age people stand out pretty easily. We were the ones at WalMart or Waffle House at 2 am because there was nothing better to do and we were bored. I don't think it ever occurred to us that we should be studying or, heaven forbid, asleep!

Clinton was a fantastic place to spend 4 years. Having only about 1200 students, PC is the kind of school where your professors notice if you're not in class more than a day or two in a row - and they care enough to call to make sure you're ok. I missed several classes with a bad case of bronchitis my senior year. I actually ended up in the infirmary for a few days because I was so contagious. I had professors calling the infirmary and my dorm room to check on me.

PC is the kind of school where professors are more than teachers. They become friends. They teach you so much more than the textbook subject matter. The best ones inspire you to want to do something better for the world, to make a difference. The school's motto is Dum Vivimus Serviums - While We Live, We Serve. It really is the hallmark of the school. It's a large part of what makes PC, PC.

I am so very much looking forward to what this weekend brings. I had always heard that college was the best 4 years of your life. I never really believed that until I experienced PC. I look back over the last 10 years and often wish I had been allowed to remain forever inside the bubble just beyond the railroad tracks and the town square where people cared enough to encourage you to dream big, were there to inspire you to be better than you thought you could be, and dared you to do things you never thought possible. But, life goes on. They say you can't really ever go home again. My mind understands that going back won't be the same, but somewhere deep down, my heart is hoping this reunion finds me picking up with friends exactly where we left off - on the west plaza in front of Neville hugging, laughing, joking and crying each other through life. I love being a Blue Hose!

Ike Photos

2008-09-26T10:39:00.014-05:00

We've all seen images of crazy reporters battling the wind and rain during the storm and then the initial reports of the damage, but it isn't often you really see the long term effects of a hurricane. These are a few pictures collected over the last week or so showing some of the damage. I still can't believe this is in my backyard.

A house in Galveston during the storm

The entrance to the Kemah Boardwalk - only about 6 miles from my house and a very popular place to eat and play games

The Gulf side of the Boardwalk after the storm

Here comes Navy Beachmaster Unit 2 out of Virginia to bring in heavy equipment to help clean up!

A house in Kemah, near the Boardwalk, that has been condemned because of damage.

Very few boats stayed in the marina!

Even the fish had problems

The before and after of Crystal Beach (near Galveston)

A hole in the middle of I-45 near the Galveston Causeway.

The clean up effort continues.

Power

2008-09-25T10:18:00.003-05:00

We finally have power at the office! Yipee! I never realized that electricity is not a luxury, but an economic necessity until all of this happened. I have enjoyed my small "hurrication", but I am ready to get back to stuff as normal. I've been working out of my boss's office for this week. It hasn't been too bad, but it's been hard to do the administrative stuff. But, we got power back yeasterday afternoon. Today, they are working on the AC and phone lines and we are going to disconnect from the server in a few minutes so our IT guy can move it and reconnect it at the office. We are going in this afternoon with fans to try to get stuff back up and ready for work tomorrow. This has been a very long week (I thought it was Friday this morning) and am so very looking forward to Homecoming next weekend at PC and the wedding of a friend at work. Perhaps this nightmare of recovery is almost over. God has been so very faithful and has continually been poking and whispering that I need to remember that He is in charge.

Cleaning Up Because Life Goes On

2008-09-19T12:49:00.002-05:00

This whole hurricane thing has been an interesting experience. Leaving for Rita was a lot different because nothing really happened. We had one bush get blown sideways, but that was it. It was a good exericse in what to do pre- and during the storm, but nothing could have prepared me for what to do after the storm. I am so very lucky to have not sustained any damage to the house. I did lose one piece of plywood (which admittedly, I had a hard time getting up). It splintered when it was ripped off the window frame. Two or three other pieces fell off and crushed some plants, but didn't splinter. Other than having to completely throw away a lot of food because we lost power for 3-5 days, there was not much else to clean up except to pull down 2 tree limbs and clean up the front yard from all the limbs and brush that fell down. My yard is still a mess - partly because of the dead grass in spots and partly because it hasn't been mowed, but that's something I'll deal with this weekend or when T gets home next weekend.

The real mess in all of this has been my office. We still don't have power there and are working remotely as best we can. I didn't realize until today how much easier it is to work at the office. I've been able to log on and check email and stuff remotely before, but now I have several motions and things that need to be filed and mailed out. I think I'm going to end up at Office Depot or someplace to make copies and get stamps. It's frustrating to be able to complete something but not get it mailed out. On top of that, my boss is worried about the financial side of running an office. I understand his concern - he has about 30 people to worry about and if we're not there to work or mail out invoices, there's no money coming in. No money means no payroll, which could mean laying people off temporarily. Of course, most of our clients are not working at 100% either, but that often means they need us even more. It's very frustrating. On the one hand, I am so grateful for what I have. On the other hand, I'm annoyed about the complications with work and worried how that will turn out. The office is in the part of the grid that is projected to get service "sometime after Monday, September 22". That's not comforting - they can't even give us an estimate of the timeframe. I know the power people are doing everything they can and have brought in crews from all over the country. I can't imagine how much worse it would be if others weren't willing to help. There's another blessing!

As best I can tell, most of my friends have fared ok. Many are still without power, but their homes are intact. I have one friend whose roof collapsed into their living room. She and the kids have gone to FL to stay with her family while her husband tries to get stuff cleaned up at the house. They have 2 boys - 4 years old and 2 months old. I'm glad she's somewhere safe, but I wish I was closer to help her out a bit. The church had some damage and doesn't have power, but it' still standing. I'm looking forward to seeing people Sunday to see if I can help. I feel selfish having 2extra bedrooms with people needing a place to sleep. So far, my offers have not been accepted, but all I an do is offer.

Life is somewhat back to normal (work issues aside), but driving around town isn't fun. For starters, most of the traffic lights are blinking red if they're there are all. Most of the gas stations and grocery stores in my area are back up and running. A few are still on generators, so perishables are not available, but most are back up as normal and are relatively full stocked with no lines. There are still a lot of buildings and places you can see damaged. A few neighborhoods between my house and office have been blocked off with concrete barricades. I love that area of town, but am so thankful I don't live there at this time. I had a client who used to live in that neighborhood, but after Rita, his wife made them move to the complete other side of town because she was tired of dealing with hurricanes. One of T's favorite places is now gone. The roof was torn off and I think at least 1 wall is missing. It was a neat place - probably the only bar I've ever actually liked. It was an old building that had a lot of NASA memorabilia on the walls. They didn't serve anything but hamburgers & fries, but they were so fresh and good. The owners were really nice people. I'm sad it's gone.

So, life will continue on. I'm lucky to not be one of the people on tv having to file FEMA claims and deal with being homeless or having their lives shattered and their "treasures" destroyed. As I've told many people, it's just stuff, but it's my stuff. Memories attached to things make life better sometimes. Hurricane Ike has changed a lot of lives. Life will go on, but it won't be the same.

Blessings in a Storm

2008-09-16T17:39:00.002-05:00

I'm sitting here blogging now from a home in Baton Rouge, LA that was opened up to me while I was on the road evacuating from Ike. My friends, C & M, and their 2 girls, E & M, evacuated to Baton Rouge to stay with C's parents early Thursday morning (around 1 am). Thursday, after I had packed up the car, gone to the office and packed up the office with everyone, I got in the car to drive to Mesquite, to stay with some church friends. I got a call just as I pulled out of the office driveway that they could take me in in LA. So, I changed course and headed east down I-10. Traffic wasn't bad and I made it in about 4.5 hours. I have been so blessed to have a home opened up to me - a total stranger. I have been blessed to have a home to go home to. Two people have gone by the house to check on it and the power situation. Both reported it all looked ok. Some of my plywood came down, which I thought it would since I didn't really know what I was doing when I put it up, but the fence is still up and there doesn't appear to be any damage. Supposedly we got power back last night, but I'm not totally sure if it'll be up when I get back tomorrow. For now, though, I have a warm bed, good food and a roof over my head. I am blessed!

Handling Problems

2008-09-10T15:03:00.003-05:00

Someone sent me this on Facebook. It somehow gives me a boost of confidence.

Ike

2008-09-10T14:09:00.003-05:00

You know that song "I want to be like Mike"? I've got a new version - "I don't want to meet Ike". I hate the stress and worry that comes with hurricanes. My stomach has been in knots the last 3 days trying to figure out what's going on. I have a load of stuff packed by the back door just waiting for the evacuation order. All I have left is to pack some clothes and put up the ply wood. I've never done that by myself, so hopefully my neighbors will be nice and avaiable if I need help. I'm also hoping I'm worrying about nothing. But, as the hours tick by, more and more reports of evacuations further down the coast trickle in, each one causing a new small wave of panic. We just got a report that our local schools are closing Friday "just as a precaution". I'm fairly confident it won't hit directly here, but I don't know what will happen since we're probably going to be on the "dirty" side of the system. And no matter what my confidence level is, my stomach won't stop churning. I think I should move to higher ground and jsut be sedated through the weekend!

Hurricanes

2008-09-08T10:00:00.002-05:00

So, it's September, which in states on the Gulf of Mexico, means hurricane season. The season actually runs from June to November, but nothing major seems to happen until September. We dodged Dolly (which hit to the south of us) and Eduard (which weakened to a tropical storm) and Gustav (which hit to the east of us). Now, it looks like, at least for the next day or so, we're in the direct path of Ike. I can hope and pray that it moves somewhere else, but I think Houston's luck might run out soon. So, even though T makes fun of me for buying more water, canned goods and camping gear, I've gathered supplies all into one spot. Last night, I mentally packed the car with the things I know I have to take like my work computer, the water I've started to horde (because there won't be any in the stores when I get back) and the "important papers" box.

Tonight, I'll start packing the smaller things that mean so much but I don't need in every day life. By Thursday, we should have a good idea of where it'll actually hit and I'll be able to load the car if needed and plan a route (I actually did this when we thought Gustav might hit here). I do not relish the thought of being stuck in the traffic that will arise when the whole world thinks it has to get out - 13 hours to make a 3 hour trip is not my idea of fun. Which reminds me - if you or someone you know lives on the north side of a city near the water and are more than 30 miles inland, please stay home long enough to let those of us near the coast get out of the way. The north side might get wind and rain, but those of us near the coast will get the 20 feet of storm surge that can come with a catagory 4 or 5. From all of us on the south side, let me be the first to say thanks! Can someone please remind me why we live in the Gulf of Mexico near the water?

Single again

2008-09-02T16:40:00.003-05:00

I hate it when he leaves. The drive the airport is always so rushed, and it goes by way too quickly. Maybe I should start having him fly into the airport on the other side of town just to have a longer trip together. But, that causes problems of its own with scheduling and, let's face it, gas prices aren't exactly cheap right now. So, it's back to working late, spinach salad suppers and finding things to occupy my time while I wait.

I don't know how my friends with spouses deployed overseas do this. Friends here tell me how impressed they are with the way I deal with the separation. I get comments about how strong I am and how they could never do it. Some of them even get mad at T for leaving. They think it's inconsiderate. I don't enjoy him being gone, but I am so proud of what he does. It's a sacrifice I am learning to make. I never thought I'd be able to do it - especially the first one that seemed to go on forever (it was only 3.5 years, after all). Watching him drive off that time was hard. I kept waiting for him to turn around and tell me he'd made a mistake and that the Navy really didn't need him in PA without me. The year in CA was better because it was a shorter time, but it was still really hard to go home from work that first night. Even though it's much more expensive for us, I like it better when he flies because it seems so much less permanent than driving away.

Our deployed friends go 12-18 months without seeing their loved ones. Not only is the separation hard, it's compounded by the fact that the deployed person isn't always in a safe spot like PA, CA or FL where the biggest threat is a snow, an earthquake, or a hurricane. They face much more serious threats like bullets and bombs. The one left behind waits for those random 4am phone calls and worries that a CACO officer will show up at their door. I may get those random calls, but they are usually because T can't sleep and is bored. And, I don't worry about a CACO officer showing up. I hope I never have to figure out how they do it.

So, once again, I'm single. This time, though, it's only for 25 more days and then he'll be home - just barely in time for our anniversary and hopefully for longer than 6 months. I'm not looking forward to the stillness tonight and will probably work late to avoid it. Did I mentione I hate him being gone?

Hurricanes, Heart Attacks and Other "Fun" Stuff

2008-09-02T11:32:00.008-05:00

I thought having T home this weekend would be a restful and relaxing way to spend a three day weekend. Instead, we got to watch out for a hurricane, deal with chest pains, and solve all the world's problems in a mere 24 hours. Well, we didn't have to solve all the problems, but a few did arise.

The weekend started out fairly relaxing - we went to see the Johnny Cash Show, which was a revue by this guy who sounds just like the original. In fact, the sound was so good that there were times it was hard to decide if he was singing or lip synching (by no means do I think he was not singing - it was just that good). It was really fun and a great show - I highly recommend it.

Sunday brought the fun part - while I am very sorry that the hurricane hit Louisiana, I can't begin to tell you how thankful we are that we didn't have to evacuate or deal with any of it. We evacuated for Rita three years ago (on our anniversary weekend) and got stuck in the fun traffic that comes with evacuations. I decided we should go to SAT - it's the closest city that I am the most familiar with and felt reasonably comfortable driving around. It usually takes 3-3.5 hours to get there and is somewhat boring drive down a flat, straight section of I-10. I check off our usual landmarks and know about how much further it is. We usually drive it in daylight and it's not a bad drive for a fun weekend away. When we evacuated, however, it took us 13 hours to get there and it was bumper to bumper (literally in some places) the whole way. We left our house at 6pm Wed night and pulled off I-10 at 7am the following morning. We were blessed to have cell phone service the whole way and were able to follow each other (because we were among those people who loaded up both cars and contributed to the congestion). We even made it all the way without needing to stop for gas (we needed stop and stretch, but not for gas). In fact, my gas light came on as we pulled off the freeway. It was a long hot weekend, but overall, not nearly as bad as it could have been. In fact, the worst part was mentally preparing myself to not have a home to go back to. That was by far the worst of all of it. This weekend, however, we were blessed to be just far enough west to not have to deal with it. I'm hoping we'll get some rain out of it, but nothing else is supposed to happen. Weather is highly unpredictable, though, so who knows. At least the worst of it has passed. I did all our usual preparations - which T thought were funny and totally useless, but I decided if we lost power, we'd be well stocked! T wants to bubble wrap the house next time, but I'm not sure how you do that.

Sunday evening brought the next round of fun as T came in working in the garage. After a sit in the jet tub, he pitifully cries out my name and tells me his back and chest are hurting. Then, he asks me to rub his shoulder. I didn't realize it was his left shoulder until a few minutes went by. It started connecting everything and asked if we needed to go to the ER. He always seems to time things so that our regular dr. isn't open. He told me no, he's ok but he doesn't feel good. So, we started with the heating pad to see if it was just shoulder muscles being too tight (he sits at a desk all day and his shoulders are usually in knots). That was uncomfortable after a few minutes. Then, he asks if we have any aspirin - I only use ibuprofen, so that's all we had stocked. He took 2 of those and then we used the back massager for a bit. That seemed to help but he said he still hurt. This went all all night with neither of us getting much sleep - him being in pain and me worrying something would happen if I slept. By Monday, he was complaining less but still wasn't happy. So, when he asked if the insurance card I gave him was still good, I asked again if we needed to go to the ER. Of course, we switched insurance plans on Monday (9/1), and I don't have a card yet. He decided not to go but as 7am, I was at CVS getting aspirin. I'm sure I looked like a bag lady in my pjs, ballcap and glasses. By 10, we were both asleep and slept off an on all day. I made him put on my heart rate monitor I use while working out - it went from 00 to 90 to the mid 70s. He checked his own pulse and said it was at 70, which isn't too bad. By last night, he was feeling better and decided he would go to the dr. for a full physical when he gets back to FL. I don't know what all they'll do, but if he experiences anything like this again while I'm around, we're going to the hospital.

Then, we founds out he wasn't selected for another job with the Navy. So, once this one ends in 2 years, I have no idea where he'll be. He's getting closer and closer to retirement, which makes him unhappy, but as you move up the ladder, there are fewer and fewer jobs. I'm still praying about that one.

Other than the minor issues like the anti-virus program eating his entire laptop, the balance of the weekend was fairly uneventful. We did grill steaks for Labor Day, but somehow, it just wasn't very festive. I really didn't want to go to work today since he's still home, but someone has to solve the rest of the world's problems! He leaves again this afternoon and will be gone for another few weeks. He'll be home, though, the night before our anniversary, so that's a good thing. I hate it when he leaves. The whole house is way too quiet and it's very very lonely. I'll be

glad when he's home again.

ps - thanks cjoy for the introduction to blogger-land. I've enjoyed my stay so far!

Friends

2008-08-26T08:01:00.007-05:00

I discovered again last night just how great God is. I have been blessed with some amazing heart friends - some of whom I've known for more than 15 years. They have always been there with things happen. Sadly, I live too far from my true heart friends. But, I am discovering more and more about being "on the frontier" as one friend puts it. Seems like every time T is gone on a set of orders, something happens. It isn't always something big, but something always seems to happen when he's gone. The first go round, when he was in PA, I got a new job, we got married and we moved into our house. By no means was either disasterous, but they were big things and I needed him to be around. When he was in CA, my car died and I had to go buy a new one - by myself. You'd think after buying a house pretty much by yourself a car would be no big deal. But, I had nice helpful people with the house and was on my own with the sales guy for the car. But, God provided amazing people who stepped in to help out when I felt lost. My church family has been amazing the all the times he's been gone. At various times, I've been invited out to eat, people have randomly felt the need to call and check on mem and people have been very supportive in just being my friend. I always marvel at how one step outside my comfort zone has so often led to a huge blessing.

Last night was another one. I had a flat tire (in the car I got less than a year ago). It wasn't late at night, but it was getting dark. I was alone (except for the really nice people who tried to stop and help me, but you can never tell about people you don't know). I happened to be on the phone with my boss about something when I discovered it. He said he was across town picking up his daughter but he'd be by as soon as he got her to help. He also recommended I call a client's after hour service to see if they could come tow it. Towing it until morning doesn't do me much good because I am flying solo right now and have no other way to drive. Even if I could drive T's car (it's a manual I'm not so good with), I don't have the keys! I called T to find out about the roadside benefits with our insurance.

Then, our office manager and her husband, who are right down the street from the offfice and me, call and say they are on their way. My boss called them. They came and her really, really, really nice husband got dirty and sweaty and eaten by mosquitoes to change my tire. She and I had a chance to visit for a few minutes with their 2 year old. I would have never thought to call them, but there they were in almost no time (well, it felt like an eternity, but it really didn't take that long). I am fairly independent, and I don't like inconveniencing people, so probably would never have thought to call them or anyone else other than the roadside people, but there they were. I didn't realize we were as good of friends as we are turning out to be. I'm not big on being the damsel, but it was such a huge blessing to know that someone came to my rescue. I'll never understand how I'm so blessed to have friends who appear at the oddest times and even more so to have such a big God in control.

Smart kid

2008-08-22T16:46:00.003-05:00

I found this quote on the social networking site of a friend of mine from church I'll call "BD". She is a rising sophomore who "tagged" me to be a friend through this site. In browsing around different parts, I came across her description of herself. She's a smart kid and unashamed of the decisions she's made in her walk with God. I'm so amazed at her honesty and aspire to live this statement in my daily life.

"I am a part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have Holy Spirit power. The dye has been cast. I have stepped over the line. I am a disciple of his. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed. I am finished with low living, sight walking, smooth knees, colorless dream, tamed visions, mundane talking and dwarfed goals. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, rewarded. I now live by faith, lean on His presence, walk by patience, live by prayer, labor by power. My faith is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven. My road is narrow, my companions few, my guide reliable, my mission clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of the adversary or negociate at the table of the enemy. I won't give up, shut up, let up; until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, preached up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus. I must go until He comes, give til I drop, preach so all know, and work till He stops me. And when He comes for His own, He will have no problems recognizing me. My banner will be clear."

Pet peeves

2008-08-22T13:46:00.005-05:00

Recently, I've discovered 2 new pet peeves at work - people not following instructions and people cont communicating clearly. Maybe I'm the only one in the world that this happens to, but I seem to have a consistent problem of people not following instructions or requests. I had a court hearing this morning downtown. Two days ago, I had a client call to fix a problem on a Warranty Deed. Problem was fixed and I instructed the client to call before she and her partner came to sign the deeds to make sure a notary was here to witness the signing. She cancelled her first appointment by calling my assistant and telling her she couldn't come. We again asked her to call before she came to make sure her trip was not a wasted effort. Of course things happen when I'm not arround. This morning, I got a frantic phone call from my boss's assistant asking what the client was supposed to sign. Then, when I tried to tell her, she shouted over me that she was too busy to handle it because she was correcting someone's Last Will (that she should have asked an attorney to read before meeting with the client, but I guess she figures it's ok for her to practice without a license - a whole different story there). I eventually worked my way to my assistant who found the documents and met with the client. My problem is, the whole thing could have been avoided if the client had just followed instructions and called BEFORE she came. She's not the first or the last to not do what we ask, but it would really make things move so much more smoothly if client's would just listen to you the first time. I wonder why people get so frustrated when things don't work the way they want when it's because they don't follow instructions.

I've also discovered that unlike some people seem to think, I'm not a very good mind reader at work. There is one assistant here who starts a conversation with "I'm doing these meeting minutes and she wants to know why x, y, z happened." This is without telling me what client, what meeting, and, most importantly, who "she" is. We have a LOT of clients, many of whom have at least 1 female involved - out of the several hundred corporate people we have worked with, how am I supposed to figure out who "she" in this particular transaction is? Some form of this conversation happens daily, and I find it most annoying because the assistant's immediate response is to get defensive and act like I'm an idiot. Now, while I have my issues and quirks, I think I'm a fairly intellingent person. I managed to survive 12 years of public school, 4 years of college and 3 years of law school and do fairly well throughout all of it. However, I have never had a class in mind-reading. I think it should be taught at all levels of education if this type of communication is going to be expected in the workplace. At least we should be given fair warning of the need to develop the skill if we want to interact with society. I don't see how she gets anything productive done during the day - especially given the increasing number of personal phone calls and the defensive mode of "I'm never responsible". Now that I've identified my new pet peeves, I'm working hard to suppress my irritation, but I have also tried to start dealing with other people to avoid the hassle. Sad that I try to avoid people, but it seems to keep my stress level lower, which I like... guess without the mind reading skill I'll never be able to fully understand people!

The more things change ...

2008-08-20T10:39:00.008-05:00

the more they stay the same. At least when it comes to T. I still don't understand his sleeping clock and have determined that it is no where near synchronized with mine! First, I should mention that I am the human alarm clock in our house. Regardless of where he is stationed (at least in the US), I set my alarm and make sure he's awake for things like Drill Weekend.

When he was in PA, I was an hour behind him, and on what I thought was the good side of the time difference given that I like to be asleep before he even thinks about going to bed. It wasn't too bad because he had to be at work really early since he was the boss. DWs were a little rough because if he wanted to be up at 5, I'd have to set the alarm for 4, which wasn't fun. But, once he was up, I went right back to sleep. When he was in CA, I thought I'm still on the good side because he'll call during the evenings right around bedtime. Then, I realized that 11 was too late for bedtime. But, it was only 9 out there, so I just go used to him waking me up most nights. But, when it came to DW, I got the benefit of getting up at a normal hour because it was 2 hours earlier in CA.

So, now he's in FL. Again, I think I'm on the good side of things - I try really hard to be flexible, but I'm almost at a breaking point on this one. He is working 2-10pm now. He can't take his phone into the building. As of right now, we don't get to talk until he gets off work because he's sleeping while I'm at work - and, while I can multi-task, I can't advise clients or draft things and carry on an intelligent conversation with him. He calls sometime after he gets off work at 10. It's only 9 here, so it shouldn't be a problem, huh? Except that he waits an hour or 2 before calling, so he's STILL calling at 11. So, no matter where he is in the world, I guess I should just adjust to him calling at 11. In fact, if he calls much earlier than that, he has to call my cell because we (still) don't have Caller ID and I try to screen calls through the answering machine when he's not home so I don't have to talk to strange people or have to tell them he's not around. No point in advertising "single white female lives alone here". We do have a pistol that I know how to use, but who wants to go through that? I guess for now, I'll just sleep early and wake up when he calls. A sleep deprived drugged up sounding phone call is better than no phone call at all... so it's true - the more things change...

New Food Plan

2008-08-18T15:42:00.007-05:00

I've been contemplating this new food plan called FirstLine Therapy. It looks similar to the really old Weight Watchers program where they tell you have many servings of each type of food group to eat and there are about 6-8 groups (ex: veggies group 1 and veggies group 2, which I think are greens & starchy ones respectively). The only thing I don't really like is the program tailored for me only allows 1 serving of bread/carbs. I really really like bread & carbs (which is a large part of the large problem around my waist). So, I am working hard to incorporate the other stuff in and gradually cut back on the carbs. Things like choosing a salad over a sub at lunch. I still ate the whole grain chips, but at least it was with a salad. Baby steps, you know? I got back from lunch a friend sent me this photo of food from the Olympics. My friend Dawn just got back from 2 years in Korea where she sampled all kinds of crazy things. I thought she purposefully sought some of them out in her quest to conquer Korea. Turns out, most of the stuff she sampled was fairly normal. Especially compared to this:

Not your typical Chinese food, huh? Yes - those are roaches, scorpions and other things you should not eat unless you are all alone on a deserted island with nothing but sand and sea water! Made me really happy to not be trying a new eating plan in China. Of course, the Chinese people appear to be fairly healthy as a whole, so maybe it's an idea. Then again, maybe a last (and I do mean last) resort option. Somehow, I think I'd rather be overweight and struggling than thin if this is what I have to eat to get there!

SWF seeking ...

2008-08-12T17:53:00.008-05:00

a husband.... since I'm single again - at least through the end of September (except for the 4 days or so I'll be married at the end of August). At least I'll get to be married again by our anniversary. Getting T out the door on a new set of orders is never easy - emotionally or physically. He's a BIG procrastinator, especially when it comes to leaving home for an extended period of time. I take that as a compliment, but it's also a huge hassle. He didn't want to do anything yesterady after weeding the flower beds in the back yard. I came home and he was in the hammock cooling off after having called complaining of not feeling well. Since it's a 100 degrees most days this time of the year, I'm sure he over did it working in the yard. He really likes yard work and seems to derive some kind of peace I don't understand from getting dirty and making the yard pretty. He's a guy, so I'm sure it has something to do with his "wiring". But, last night, once he was done, he was done!

After supper, I tried to talk him in to doing the things on his to do list that needed to be done before leaving this morning. You know, like laundry and packing. Oh, and he also wanted to clean up the whole house, balance his checkbook, update his corporate expense spreadsheet, call the AC repair guy, finish his corporate tax returns & quarterly reports, and do about a million other things he came up with Sunday as we were leaving Fredericksburg (we managed a small weekend vacation to see the Nimitz Museum before he left). Well, as usual, he got the yard work done. And, as usual, I got the laundry, packing & checkbook balancing done. The rest of it will just have to wait until I have some more time... I was pretty proud of myself for finding all the parts to his uniform and getting stuff put together in between 3 loads of laundry. I'm not really sure how he accomplished all of this for himself and often tease him by asking how he ever managed to survive without me... What was he doing while I did all of this? Sleeping. Yes, sleeping. I had the Olympics on for entertainment, but in between gymnastic rotations, I transferred clothese from the washer to the dryer, from the dryer to the couch for folding and then from the couch to either a dresser drawer or a hang up bag that has seen better days. Then, feeling slightly sentimental (and trying to surpress my annoyance), I found a stationary note card and wrote him a note to hide in his luggage. Who knows if and when he'll find it, but it's there. Then, I crawled into bed about midnight only to be very rudely awakened at 6 when the alarm went off and the bathroom light was turned without the door being closed. At least my sleep schedule will be my own for a few weeks. Maybe single isn't all bad, after all.

Thorn in My Flesh

2008-08-07T09:21:00.004-05:00

There's a reference by Paul, I think in Corinthians, about a thorn in his flesh - he asks why he does the things he know he shouldn't or doesn't really want to do and not do the things he should do. I know that feeling - especially in the weight loss area. Last night is a perfect example - I did ok through lunch and the afternoon, but the thorn dug in deep around dinner. We have a local semi-pro baseball team, the Toros. They play not too far from our house and it's cheap (only $8 for a ticket). The most expensive item on the concession menus is a $4.50 cheeseburger (that's really not worth $4.50). I don't really like hotdogs and there's not much else there to really eat other than your typical little league concession stuff (candy, fries, sno cones, etc) plus beer - after all, it is a ballpark. So, before I left the office, I decided I'd eat leftovers at home before we went to the game. I got home and T had gone to Village Pizza & Seafood - mostly fried stuff with pizzas. He really likes the fried oyster & shrimp combo. I don't dislike it, but it wasn't what I was prepared for. He bought enough for 2 of us. It was sweet that he planned supper, but again, not what I was prepared for. What he left me was not enough for a real meal, so I ate a bowl of the leftover shrimp tortellini. If I had left it at that and just had my sno cone, it would have been ok. But, again, there's this thorn - I ended up with a hotdog at the park plus my sno cone. Then, thought, ok - that's enough.

All of a sudden, at 10 pm, I found myself at Dairy Queen. Now, I don't go to DQ very often (as in maybe twice a year), so as we were headed there, I decided I would get a grape slush - figured it was less leathal than a Blizzard and I loved them as a kid... by the time I got home, my small grape slush had morphed into an M&M Blizzard - it was a small, but still... the slush would have been more than enough - and I think more satisfying than the Blizzard, which didn't turn out to be that great after all. Of course, I ate the whole thing before I decided it wasn't really worth it... I'm almost afraid to look up the calorie content... had I gotten up early and gone to the gym for a few minutes of cardio, I might not feel so bad, but that definitely didn't happen... I keep thinking - T will be gone early next week and maybe I can focus a little more carefully on this. Here's to hoping I can ignore the thorn a little better in the coming weeks.

Finding Myself

2008-08-05T16:25:00.006-05:00

So, I was inspired by a friend to start a blog... the discussion started from a weight loss discussion and ended with starting this blog. In looking for a name, I was thinking about the names other people's blogs... I like "finding myself", but apparently so does someone else because it was already taken... I really like the song by MercyMe (http://www.mercyme.org)/ called "Word of God Speak" it has a line "finding myself in the midst of you, beyond the music, beyond the noise". The whole thing is about finding yourself with God in the middle of all chaos of the world. It's what I know I should be doing yet somehow don't. It's so much easier to get caught up in the chaos of the world, so much easier to be frustrated and annoyed. Sometimes, it's even more fun to be annoyed... not that it makes life any easier, but somehow, sometimes, it makes you feel better. Seems like there is a lot I could be annoyed about - the fact that T is leaving (again) for Navy stuff, the fact that we're not the normal family I dreamed of when I was a kid, the fact our family hasn't grown, the fact I want to lose weight but somehow can't seem to be motivated, or the fact that people in my office annoy the ever living daylights out of me on days like this. Life can be a lot to take in. But, somehow, I'll find myself in the midst of it all...