Friends

I discovered again last night just how great God is. I have been blessed with some amazing heart friends - some of whom I've known for more than 15 years. They have always been there with things happen. Sadly, I live too far from my true heart friends. But, I am discovering more and more about being "on the frontier" as one friend puts it. Seems like every time T is gone on a set of orders, something happens. It isn't always something big, but something always seems to happen when he's gone. The first go round, when he was in PA, I got a new job, we got married and we moved into our house. By no means was either disasterous, but they were big things and I needed him to be around. When he was in CA, my car died and I had to go buy a new one - by myself. You'd think after buying a house pretty much by yourself a car would be no big deal. But, I had nice helpful people with the house and was on my own with the sales guy for the car. But, God provided amazing people who stepped in to help out when I felt lost. My church family has been amazing the all the times he's been gone. At various times, I've been invited out to eat, people have randomly felt the need to call and check on mem and people have been very supportive in just being my friend. I always marvel at how one step outside my comfort zone has so often led to a huge blessing.

Last night was another one. I had a flat tire (in the car I got less than a year ago). It wasn't late at night, but it was getting dark. I was alone (except for the really nice people who tried to stop and help me, but you can never tell about people you don't know). I happened to be on the phone with my boss about something when I discovered it. He said he was across town picking up his daughter but he'd be by as soon as he got her to help. He also recommended I call a client's after hour service to see if they could come tow it. Towing it until morning doesn't do me much good because I am flying solo right now and have no other way to drive. Even if I could drive T's car (it's a manual I'm not so good with), I don't have the keys! I called T to find out about the roadside benefits with our insurance.

Then, our office manager and her husband, who are right down the street from the offfice and me, call and say they are on their way. My boss called them. They came and her really, really, really nice husband got dirty and sweaty and eaten by mosquitoes to change my tire. She and I had a chance to visit for a few minutes with their 2 year old. I would have never thought to call them, but there they were in almost no time (well, it felt like an eternity, but it really didn't take that long). I am fairly independent, and I don't like inconveniencing people, so probably would never have thought to call them or anyone else other than the roadside people, but there they were. I didn't realize we were as good of friends as we are turning out to be. I'm not big on being the damsel, but it was such a huge blessing to know that someone came to my rescue. I'll never understand how I'm so blessed to have friends who appear at the oddest times and even more so to have such a big God in control.

Smart kid

I found this quote on the social networking site of a friend of mine from church I'll call "BD". She is a rising sophomore who "tagged" me to be a friend through this site. In browsing around different parts, I came across her description of herself. She's a smart kid and unashamed of the decisions she's made in her walk with God. I'm so amazed at her honesty and aspire to live this statement in my daily life.

"I am a part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have Holy Spirit power. The dye has been cast. I have stepped over the line. I am a disciple of his. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed. I am finished with low living, sight walking, smooth knees, colorless dream, tamed visions, mundane talking and dwarfed goals. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, rewarded. I now live by faith, lean on His presence, walk by patience, live by prayer, labor by power. My faith is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven. My road is narrow, my companions few, my guide reliable, my mission clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of the adversary or negociate at the table of the enemy. I won't give up, shut up, let up; until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, preached up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus. I must go until He comes, give til I drop, preach so all know, and work till He stops me. And when He comes for His own, He will have no problems recognizing me. My banner will be clear."

Pet peeves

Recently, I've discovered 2 new pet peeves at work - people not following instructions and people cont communicating clearly. Maybe I'm the only one in the world that this happens to, but I seem to have a consistent problem of people not following instructions or requests. I had a court hearing this morning downtown. Two days ago, I had a client call to fix a problem on a Warranty Deed. Problem was fixed and I instructed the client to call before she and her partner came to sign the deeds to make sure a notary was here to witness the signing. She cancelled her first appointment by calling my assistant and telling her she couldn't come. We again asked her to call before she came to make sure her trip was not a wasted effort. Of course things happen when I'm not arround. This morning, I got a frantic phone call from my boss's assistant asking what the client was supposed to sign. Then, when I tried to tell her, she shouted over me that she was too busy to handle it because she was correcting someone's Last Will (that she should have asked an attorney to read before meeting with the client, but I guess she figures it's ok for her to practice without a license - a whole different story there). I eventually worked my way to my assistant who found the documents and met with the client. My problem is, the whole thing could have been avoided if the client had just followed instructions and called BEFORE she came. She's not the first or the last to not do what we ask, but it would really make things move so much more smoothly if client's would just listen to you the first time. I wonder why people get so frustrated when things don't work the way they want when it's because they don't follow instructions.

I've also discovered that unlike some people seem to think, I'm not a very good mind reader at work. There is one assistant here who starts a conversation with "I'm doing these meeting minutes and she wants to know why x, y, z happened." This is without telling me what client, what meeting, and, most importantly, who "she" is. We have a LOT of clients, many of whom have at least 1 female involved - out of the several hundred corporate people we have worked with, how am I supposed to figure out who "she" in this particular transaction is? Some form of this conversation happens daily, and I find it most annoying because the assistant's immediate response is to get defensive and act like I'm an idiot. Now, while I have my issues and quirks, I think I'm a fairly intellingent person. I managed to survive 12 years of public school, 4 years of college and 3 years of law school and do fairly well throughout all of it. However, I have never had a class in mind-reading. I think it should be taught at all levels of education if this type of communication is going to be expected in the workplace. At least we should be given fair warning of the need to develop the skill if we want to interact with society. I don't see how she gets anything productive done during the day - especially given the increasing number of personal phone calls and the defensive mode of "I'm never responsible". Now that I've identified my new pet peeves, I'm working hard to suppress my irritation, but I have also tried to start dealing with other people to avoid the hassle. Sad that I try to avoid people, but it seems to keep my stress level lower, which I like... guess without the mind reading skill I'll never be able to fully understand people!

The more things change ...

the more they stay the same. At least when it comes to T. I still don't understand his sleeping clock and have determined that it is no where near synchronized with mine! First, I should mention that I am the human alarm clock in our house. Regardless of where he is stationed (at least in the US), I set my alarm and make sure he's awake for things like Drill Weekend.

When he was in PA, I was an hour behind him, and on what I thought was the good side of the time difference given that I like to be asleep before he even thinks about going to bed. It wasn't too bad because he had to be at work really early since he was the boss. DWs were a little rough because if he wanted to be up at 5, I'd have to set the alarm for 4, which wasn't fun. But, once he was up, I went right back to sleep. When he was in CA, I thought I'm still on the good side because he'll call during the evenings right around bedtime. Then, I realized that 11 was too late for bedtime. But, it was only 9 out there, so I just go used to him waking me up most nights. But, when it came to DW, I got the benefit of getting up at a normal hour because it was 2 hours earlier in CA.

So, now he's in FL. Again, I think I'm on the good side of things - I try really hard to be flexible, but I'm almost at a breaking point on this one. He is working 2-10pm now. He can't take his phone into the building. As of right now, we don't get to talk until he gets off work because he's sleeping while I'm at work - and, while I can multi-task, I can't advise clients or draft things and carry on an intelligent conversation with him. He calls sometime after he gets off work at 10. It's only 9 here, so it shouldn't be a problem, huh? Except that he waits an hour or 2 before calling, so he's STILL calling at 11. So, no matter where he is in the world, I guess I should just adjust to him calling at 11. In fact, if he calls much earlier than that, he has to call my cell because we (still) don't have Caller ID and I try to screen calls through the answering machine when he's not home so I don't have to talk to strange people or have to tell them he's not around. No point in advertising "single white female lives alone here". We do have a pistol that I know how to use, but who wants to go through that? I guess for now, I'll just sleep early and wake up when he calls. A sleep deprived drugged up sounding phone call is better than no phone call at all... so it's true - the more things change...

New Food Plan

I've been contemplating this new food plan called FirstLine Therapy. It looks similar to the really old Weight Watchers program where they tell you have many servings of each type of food group to eat and there are about 6-8 groups (ex: veggies group 1 and veggies group 2, which I think are greens & starchy ones respectively). The only thing I don't really like is the program tailored for me only allows 1 serving of bread/carbs. I really really like bread & carbs (which is a large part of the large problem around my waist). So, I am working hard to incorporate the other stuff in and gradually cut back on the carbs. Things like choosing a salad over a sub at lunch. I still ate the whole grain chips, but at least it was with a salad. Baby steps, you know? I got back from lunch a friend sent me this photo of food from the Olympics. My friend Dawn just got back from 2 years in Korea where she sampled all kinds of crazy things. I thought she purposefully sought some of them out in her quest to conquer Korea. Turns out, most of the stuff she sampled was fairly normal. Especially compared to this:

Not your typical Chinese food, huh? Yes - those are roaches, scorpions and other things you should not eat unless you are all alone on a deserted island with nothing but sand and sea water! Made me really happy to not be trying a new eating plan in China. Of course, the Chinese people appear to be fairly healthy as a whole, so maybe it's an idea. Then again, maybe a last (and I do mean last) resort option. Somehow, I think I'd rather be overweight and struggling than thin if this is what I have to eat to get there!

SWF seeking ...

a husband.... since I'm single again - at least through the end of September (except for the 4 days or so I'll be married at the end of August). At least I'll get to be married again by our anniversary. Getting T out the door on a new set of orders is never easy - emotionally or physically. He's a BIG procrastinator, especially when it comes to leaving home for an extended period of time. I take that as a compliment, but it's also a huge hassle. He didn't want to do anything yesterady after weeding the flower beds in the back yard. I came home and he was in the hammock cooling off after having called complaining of not feeling well. Since it's a 100 degrees most days this time of the year, I'm sure he over did it working in the yard. He really likes yard work and seems to derive some kind of peace I don't understand from getting dirty and making the yard pretty. He's a guy, so I'm sure it has something to do with his "wiring". But, last night, once he was done, he was done!

After supper, I tried to talk him in to doing the things on his to do list that needed to be done before leaving this morning. You know, like laundry and packing. Oh, and he also wanted to clean up the whole house, balance his checkbook, update his corporate expense spreadsheet, call the AC repair guy, finish his corporate tax returns & quarterly reports, and do about a million other things he came up with Sunday as we were leaving Fredericksburg (we managed a small weekend vacation to see the Nimitz Museum before he left). Well, as usual, he got the yard work done. And, as usual, I got the laundry, packing & checkbook balancing done. The rest of it will just have to wait until I have some more time... I was pretty proud of myself for finding all the parts to his uniform and getting stuff put together in between 3 loads of laundry. I'm not really sure how he accomplished all of this for himself and often tease him by asking how he ever managed to survive without me... What was he doing while I did all of this? Sleeping. Yes, sleeping. I had the Olympics on for entertainment, but in between gymnastic rotations, I transferred clothese from the washer to the dryer, from the dryer to the couch for folding and then from the couch to either a dresser drawer or a hang up bag that has seen better days. Then, feeling slightly sentimental (and trying to surpress my annoyance), I found a stationary note card and wrote him a note to hide in his luggage. Who knows if and when he'll find it, but it's there. Then, I crawled into bed about midnight only to be very rudely awakened at 6 when the alarm went off and the bathroom light was turned without the door being closed. At least my sleep schedule will be my own for a few weeks. Maybe single isn't all bad, after all.

Thorn in My Flesh

There's a reference by Paul, I think in Corinthians, about a thorn in his flesh - he asks why he does the things he know he shouldn't or doesn't really want to do and not do the things he should do. I know that feeling - especially in the weight loss area. Last night is a perfect example - I did ok through lunch and the afternoon, but the thorn dug in deep around dinner. We have a local semi-pro baseball team, the Toros. They play not too far from our house and it's cheap (only $8 for a ticket). The most expensive item on the concession menus is a $4.50 cheeseburger (that's really not worth $4.50). I don't really like hotdogs and there's not much else there to really eat other than your typical little league concession stuff (candy, fries, sno cones, etc) plus beer - after all, it is a ballpark. So, before I left the office, I decided I'd eat leftovers at home before we went to the game. I got home and T had gone to Village Pizza & Seafood - mostly fried stuff with pizzas. He really likes the fried oyster & shrimp combo. I don't dislike it, but it wasn't what I was prepared for. He bought enough for 2 of us. It was sweet that he planned supper, but again, not what I was prepared for. What he left me was not enough for a real meal, so I ate a bowl of the leftover shrimp tortellini. If I had left it at that and just had my sno cone, it would have been ok. But, again, there's this thorn - I ended up with a hotdog at the park plus my sno cone. Then, thought, ok - that's enough.

All of a sudden, at 10 pm, I found myself at Dairy Queen. Now, I don't go to DQ very often (as in maybe twice a year), so as we were headed there, I decided I would get a grape slush - figured it was less leathal than a Blizzard and I loved them as a kid... by the time I got home, my small grape slush had morphed into an M&M Blizzard - it was a small, but still... the slush would have been more than enough - and I think more satisfying than the Blizzard, which didn't turn out to be that great after all. Of course, I ate the whole thing before I decided it wasn't really worth it... I'm almost afraid to look up the calorie content... had I gotten up early and gone to the gym for a few minutes of cardio, I might not feel so bad, but that definitely didn't happen... I keep thinking - T will be gone early next week and maybe I can focus a little more carefully on this. Here's to hoping I can ignore the thorn a little better in the coming weeks.

Finding Myself

So, I was inspired by a friend to start a blog... the discussion started from a weight loss discussion and ended with starting this blog. In looking for a name, I was thinking about the names other people's blogs... I like "finding myself", but apparently so does someone else because it was already taken... I really like the song by MercyMe (http://www.mercyme.org)/ called "Word of God Speak" it has a line "finding myself in the midst of you, beyond the music, beyond the noise". The whole thing is about finding yourself with God in the middle of all chaos of the world. It's what I know I should be doing yet somehow don't. It's so much easier to get caught up in the chaos of the world, so much easier to be frustrated and annoyed. Sometimes, it's even more fun to be annoyed... not that it makes life any easier, but somehow, sometimes, it makes you feel better. Seems like there is a lot I could be annoyed about - the fact that T is leaving (again) for Navy stuff, the fact that we're not the normal family I dreamed of when I was a kid, the fact our family hasn't grown, the fact I want to lose weight but somehow can't seem to be motivated, or the fact that people in my office annoy the ever living daylights out of me on days like this. Life can be a lot to take in. But, somehow, I'll find myself in the midst of it all...